What is it about the age of 23 that causes everyone, young and old, to agree that it is the worst year of one’s life?
It’s a time when everything is a little rough around the edges. Everything, including yourself, is swiftly changing, and you’re on the edge of your seat. And it can feel as though you’re not a part of it all at times.
Twenty-three was by far the worst year of my life, as well as the lives of the majority of my friends and family. There are much too many transitions in this piece.
You’re stuck in too many limbos between adulthood and feeling like a college student. It’s disturbing, energizing, hardening, and frantic all at the same time.
I wasn’t clinically sad, but I went to visit a psychiatrist because I needed a reason to get out of my parents’ house. (Have you ever seen a private psychiatric facility in a big city? That was over in a flash.)
Despite the fact that my friends were going through it as well, I still felt alone in my experience. I thought I just needed to get away, but I needed to confront myself.
Without attempting to be theatrical (who am I kidding? ), I’d like to share some thoughts. Yes, I am.) your entire being is in jeopardy. According to science, your brain is nearing the end of its mental apex, or, to put it another way, it is on the verge of mental decline.
Your prefrontal brain, which controls emotional reactions, is at its peak of development, driving us insane with emotions. The rest of your brain, on the other hand, is storing the information it believes it will need in the future and discarding the rest. It’s no surprise that 23 seems like a mental rollercoaster.
From the beginning, I was delusional. I assumed that my posh degree and phony confidence would suffice. My energy force was unstoppable, and I thought I had everything going for me.
Instead, I learnt that in order to progress ahead in life, you must sometimes take a step backward. That no place seems like home after relocating five times in two years. And that when you do make it to the other side, you’ll be the genuine deal, which means you’ll be extremely happy.
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You’re too old to be making the same mistakes you made your first year out of college, but not old enough yet to act like an adult.
Like throwing an unlawful party on your roof knowing that it is against the law and that your neighbors would call the cops. Or staying the night at that guy’s place when you’re not sure if you really want to.
You’re over those risky behaviors when you’re older (or maybe you’ve just replaced them with other ones); while you’re younger, you don’t even aware you’re doing them. You’re 23 and you’re stuck in the middle.
Your best friends change
You’re gradually eliminating unimportant individuals from your life and narrowing down who you’ll make an effort for and who you won’t. You’re spending more and more time with your favorite coworker and less and less time with your acquaintances. It’s critical to realize that this isn’t always a terrible thing.
You’re at the bottom of the totem pole again
You’re no longer taken seriously. It’s as if you had a lot of freedom in college and now you’re back to being a freshman. You can’t afford fancy restaurants or nights out, but you’ve outgrown your small flat.
You think you’re in a serious relationship, but you still have Tinder downloaded
When it comes to hooking up, hanging out, and having sex, what’s the difference? The lines are smudged. No one is prepared for anything severe, but after being burnt too many times in the past, you assume you are.
Marriage is a long way off, and one-night hookups are a thing of the past. Plus, the people you seek are either immature or mature enough not to want you back.
You’re young enough to miss home, but too old to admit it
Because you’ve left home before, you think you’re a big shot, yet something feels different this time. You’re well aware of the wide range of ages and experiences among the folks you encounter on a daily basis.
And you have the impression that you are the youngest of them all. You used to look forward to being away from home, but now that you’re so far away, you enjoy it much more. Remember that this is a positive thing.
You falsely believe you’ve entered the real world, but it hasn’t fully hit you yet
With the lights on and “Glee” playing in the background, you’re still passing out. You’re still scrolling through your phone’s camera roll, gazing at old photographs from your 21st birthday that are still fresh in your mind.
One foot is cautiously landing on the floor of your first “Big Girl” apartment, while the other is still attempting to get out of your mother’s crowded automobile.
All you hear about are kids your age changing the world and you’re still interning
What was that kid in Anthro 101 doing with his homework that you weren’t? What the hell happened to that nerd who came out of nowhere to be more successful than you? Why aren’t you wealthy, well-known, and the CEO of your own company?
Relationships are complicated
College students are too young for you, yet older students are difficult to relate to. You believe you’re falling in love with someone, but what you’re really falling in love with is the fact that you won’t be alone at this difficult time.
You’ve toughened up on the outside, but you’re still soft on the inside. Your inner feelings are in such a state of disarray that you couldn’t possibly open them up to someone else, even if you wanted to.
You’re transitioning between entry-level job and career
Transitions across fields, wages, and office spaces are numerous. You’re still figuring out what you want to do with your life, despite the fact that everyone around you is pressuring you to make a decision. It’s a little unsettling.
You’re sexually frustrated
Your early twenties are the years of experimentation. You could know what you want but aren’t sure how to express it. Or you’re bored with what you’ve been doing and aren’t sure what you want to do next.
You’re still unsure of who you are
It’s perplexing because you’re not the person you imagined yourself to be five years ago, at the age of 18, when 23 seemed a long time away. And when you consider the person you’ll be in five years, you know it won’t be the same because of this experience.
Nobody likes you when you’re 23
This moodiness is similar to that of an adolescent. You wake up one day feeling on top of the world, as if you’ve finally cracked the code. The next day, you’re up on your feet, scrambling and wondering how you got so low so quickly. Don’t be concerned. There’s a light at the end of the tunnel. It’s referred to as 24.
Your brain is nearly done changing
The “use it or lose it” principle is in full effect here. Your prefrontal cortex and cerebellum, which are important in emotional control and higher-order cognitive function, are fully mature, while other areas of your brain have achieved their mental apex.
It’s possible that you’ll never feel or think like this again. Remind yourself: After the year you’ve had, this is most likely a good thing.
You still don’t know what you’re doing
You are, nevertheless, required to act as if you do. The bosses don’t realize you’ve never done something like this before. Colleagues with gleaming resumes aren’t interested in wasting their time. To be noticed, you must put in extra effort.
You’re in new territory
It’s the first time you’re not able to rely on school. Even though you’ve broken free from the school-bell routine, you’re still tethered to your office workstation. When all you want are straight answers, there are too many paradoxes.
You’re still dressing like a confused tween on the red carpet
Short, tight, stretchy American Apparel dresses are no longer an option, but elegant Theory pantsuits are out of reach. So you go for something weirdly in the middle that doesn’t work in any scenario and finish up looking like Jamie Lynn Spears at a business conference.
Your old habits are still there
You haven’t grown out of chewing your nails or buying a tabloid magazine for $5. Even though your metabolism has slowed, you won’t give up fast trips to the vending machine. It makes no difference what his surname is or who bought you that drink.
You forgot to close your purse once more. In a futile attempt to change your behaviors, you’re sticking to old ones and establishing new ones.
You’ve got growing pains
At this age, the prospect of becoming older makes you fearful and uneasy since you feel so far behind emotionally and professionally. You’re aching to get out of 23, but you’re still not ready in terms of your lifestyle choices.
What does it mean to be 23 years old?
People who despise birthdays have always perplexed me. Those who spend the day as if it were any other or who are irritated by the fact that they are a year older. Personally, I’ve always cherished this unique day, regardless of the year or the present happenings in my life. Birthdays serve as a reminder that there is still so much more to look forward to. There are a few “critical years” that every young person eagerly anticipates. Those enticing ages that promise to transform our life. Sweet 16 with a new automobile and cool high school students. Or 18, when we feel like we’re fully grown ups until we realize we don’t smoke and that buying a lottery ticket isn’t all that exciting. And then there’s the big two-one. It’s all fun and games until you’re sick of the margaritas you’re now permitted to consume. To tell you the truth, I enjoyed being 16 and 18. I also enjoyed my 21st birthday. None of those birthdays, though, were the ones I was most looking forward to.
This next step, when we become genuinely autonomous, is what I’ve been looking forward to the most. This is the moment when we are free to be ourselves, with our own accomplishments and failings. It’s a period when we can be whoever we want and let go of who we were in high school and college. A period of time that marks the start of the remainder of our life.
Prior to turning 23, things can get a little strange. There are many shifts, many unknown circumstances, and many perplexing encounters. But it’s also what gets us ready for what’s to comea true foretaste of what’s to come.
Growing older and mastering these skills will help us get through the most exciting years of our lives.
Happiness Is A Mood, Not A Destination,
Looking for that one day when everything will be perfect is tiring since that day does not exist. Accept that happiness and success are moods that come and go throughout our life, and that this is perfectly normal.
Enjoy the good times when they come along, and keep your head up when things aren’t going so well.
Take Care Of Yourself.
In the past, binge-drinking and eating chips for breakfast, lunch, and dinner may have worked for you. However, you must learn to look after yourself. Learn to do things on your own no matter where you are right nowat home, in a great new job in NYC, or in your grandparents’ basement. Prepare nutritious meals. Exercise. Take a walk. Meditate. Take care of your physique because it won’t be young forever. You will not believe what it will do for your mind and soul.
Family Matters.
Whether it’s biological relatives, adopted family members, or coworkers, they appreciate you. They’re fantastic. Keep them in your heart. They are the ones who keep up with you on a daily basis and motivate you to keep going.
Read More.
I understand how difficult it is to avoid using social media. It’s difficult to put down the iPad. But please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, This isn’t kindergarten, and it’s not going to turn you become a “nerd.” You will not become lame as a result of it. Look for something you enjoy. I don’t care if it’s a political novel or if you enjoy horrific murder mysteries. I don’t mind if you want to read the most recent Twilight novel (okay maybe I care just a little). The aim is to divert your attention away from whatever you’re doing. Give your mind some new knowledge and thoughts to chew on. Away from the pandemonium inside your head, trigger thoughts and feelings from the outer world. We all require healthy diversions.
Learn To Manage Money.
You won’t get very far if you’re clueless, and loans don’t pay themselves. Stop eating out every day and then whining about how broke you are. Why not start now? Being financially knowledgeable is something you will always find advantageous in life.
Being Alone Doesn’t Mean That You’re Lonely.
You won’t get very far if you’re clueless, and loans don’t pay for themselves. Stop going out to eat every day and then whining about how poor you are. Why not start now? Being financially knowledgeable is something you will always find useful throughout life.
There’s Nothing Wrong With Needing People.
We are not superhumans, and we do not live in a perfect world. Talk to whatever it is you’re looking for. Take a vacation back to your hometown. Tell someone you miss them by calling them. Stop burying your emotions. The more negativity you retain inside of you, the more poisonous it will become. We are all in need of someone.
Open Your Eyes.
Open your mind to new possibilities. Make new friends. Take inspiration from various cultures. Try to comprehend many mindsets and perspectives on the world. We have a lot to learn from others, but we don’t do it nearly enough.
Push Out Of Your Comfort Zone.
Do something that worries you, regardless of your personality type or who you are. Make an effort to accomplish something you’ve never done before. Make a decision that you may come to regret later. “The beauty is in the endeavour,” someone once said. Isn’t that the whole point? To make an attempt. To investigate. The rest will take care of itself if we push ourselves.
Do Things For Other PeopleAnd Don’t Expect Anything In Return.
We often believe that in order to serve the world and be someone, we must be Gandhi or Mother Theresa, but this is not the case. Helping others and giving back to the community is so simple. Find something that interests you and offer assistance in whatever manner you can. More kindness is needed in the world. And it all begins with ourselves.
Stop Apologizing For Who You Are.
It’s something we’ve all done. I still do it now and then. It’s perfectly natural. It’s only natural. What isn’t human is feeling compelled to explain ourselves to everyone in the cosmos at all times. I’ve learnt over the last year that the only person we need to impress is ourselves. Do people look down on us? Yes. Do they try to compel us to do what they want? Sometimes. Do I give them permission? Not any longer. Our goal in life is to be happy, not to satisfy other people.
Find Something To Look Forward To.
Outside of the bubble we’ve been in for the past few years, there’s such a gorgeous planet. You’ll lose out on some truly beautiful things if you don’t take the time to investigate and appreciate it all. It’s fine to miss specific individuals or situations in our lives, but we must learn to let go. If there are things you regret or wish you could change, know that you still have the opportunity to do so. The coming year will be a year of true liberation. You are the one who determines your expectations. Your objectives are determined by you. You get to choose what you want to accomplish and who you want to be.
It’s Okay To Ignore The World Sometimes.
When things get too hard to bear, turn them off. Don’t ignore crucial information or lose track of current events, but use the mute button now and again. Take a walk while listening to your favorite music. Allow yourself to be free of the burdens that the world places on your shoulders.
Don’t Hold Grudges.
It might be difficult to let go of individuals and events that have caused us pain. But if we hold on to all of our rage, we’ll never be able to move forward. Recognize that what occurred in the past has passed you by, and move on.
Never Stop Looking For Something Better.
The idea is to be grateful for what you have now at all times. It’s fine to want more, better, or different things as long as they don’t interfere with your capacity to enjoy what you already have. Never give up. Keep going until you find exactly what you’re looking for.
Spend More Time Alone.
We all need time alone, whether we are outgoing or not, extroverted or introverted. What are your true feelings? What are your true feelings? Spend some time alone with your thoughts, away from the white noise and the incessant throng. You’ll be amazed at how much you discover about yourself.
Everything Is Temporary.
It’s a bummer when good things come to an endrelationships, events, road trips, or anything else you enjoy. But it’s equally vital to remember that feelings of sadness or anxiety don’t linger forever. Enjoy the good while it lasts, and don’t worry about the bad; it will pass when you least expect it.
Tell People You Love And Appreciate Them.
You are not obligated to do anything because you believe a terrible accident will occur tomorrow. Simply do it because you want to and because it is important to you. People are important. Those who have wronged us have also taught us something. Those who have abandoned us have had to put up with us at one point or another. Those who are still here, moreover, are our true riches. Recognize them.
Be Thankful.
When things don’t go our way, I understand how frustrating it may be. We have a tendency to place blame on everything and everyone, including ourselves. I’m not going to tell you to feel better because some people are fighting or because some people are starving. Yes, we do require some perspective. Yes, we should be grateful for what others do not have. But most importantly, be grateful simply for the purpose of being thanks. It will make you happier and fill your life with more positivity.
Educate Yourself And Others.
We live in a world where shaming and judging other cultures, beliefs, and ways of life is all too simple. It’s fine to disagree with someone. It’s normal to be annoyed by people who don’t perceive things the way we do. But, please, no more hatred. Stop bullying on social media. Stop sharing posts about which you have no knowledge. First, educate yourself, then educate others. Information overload isn’t fun for anyone, and when it’s handled improperly, it does more harm than good.
Somewhere, Somehow, Sh*t Just Works OutStop Worrying.
This is something I have to remind myself of every day, because let’s face it, life is difficult. Life throws us a lot of obstacles, making decisions is never easy, and we’re constantly under pressure. However, you must remind yourself from time to time that you have already surmounted your greatest challenges. You’ve arrived. You’re still on your way. Things will always find a way, no matter how hard you try. All you can do is work hard and be the best you can be. The rest, I assure you, will take care of itself.
There’s Still So Much Time.
Get pumped for the next year. The next move is up to you. Your next adventure awaits you. For some people, reaching the age of 23 may signal the end of something wonderful. But, in truth, it’s just the start of something incredible. Now is the time when our lives truly begin. It is now our turn to do anything we want. Now is the moment to go out into the world and be who we want to be. It’s time to remake ourselves, to let go of previous mistakes and regrets, and to flip the page and begin again. So go ahead and rediscover yourself. You must rebuild yourself. All you have to do now is choose a location and get started.
Is 23 years old?
You are ancient to someone under the age of 23*. You are youthful to someone above the age of 23*. * Substitute your current age. Note: don’t concentrate on the idea that you’re old; if you do, you’ll waste your golden years worrying that you’re too old, until you’re genuinely old (I’m thinking 80+ years old).
Is the age of 24 considered old?
The recent argument in political and polling circles about whether a “youthquake” caused the 2017 election result has raised an even more fundamental question: who, exactly, are these “youthquakes”? “Who are the young people? Most political observers seem to use the term to refer to people under the age of 25, but at least one has indicated that it can refer to people in their mid-forties.
It’s critical, as The Economist has pointed out, that politicians’ conceptions of young and old match those of the general public:
“65 is still considered the start of old age in parts of the developed world. Words like ‘old’ and’retired’ signal to policymakers, as well as to old people themselves, how they should behave and be treated by governments, businesses, and employers as jobs end, subsidised bus travel begins, and people begin to be seen as a financial burden rather than an asset to the state… words like ‘old’ and’retired’ signal to policymakers, as well as to old people themselves, how they should behave and be treated by governments, businesses, and employers.
This reasoning might also be extended to young individuals (see for example government policy allowing for lower minimum wage rates for the under-25s). If the major parties miscalculate the age range during which people consider themselves young and base their policies on that, they risk alienating a large number of voters. For example, making young people policy primarily about university access and tuition fees may alienate many young people who are not yet university age.
A new YouGov poll indicates where Britons feel the lines between important life periods such as youth, middle age, and old age are drawn.