believes that this is the case because retrogrades bring our love baggage from the past into the present.” According to Potter, Mercury’s retrograde is pulling the past into the present and back to us, including previous relationships. “I discover that things frequently come back when they aren’t finished. So, a former lover who has unfinished business with you may get in touch with you because they’ve been thinking about or missing you.
In This Article...
Do ex-lovers return while Mercury is retrograde?
Old lovers always manage to find their way back into your DMs around this time, but don’t act foolishly. You might feel the want to reunite with an ex when Mercury is retrograde, but you might later regret it. The answer to the questions, “Why do I keep thinking about my ex?” and “Should I keep my ex as a backup?” is obvious: no.
How do ex-partners react to Mercury’s retrograde?
Ex-lovers are among the people from the past who frequently return during Mercury retrograde. Although now is an excellent moment to address old grudges, a reconciliation is not a given. However, it can offer some resolution and insight into what went wrong in the first place.
What occurs to relationships following Mercury’s retrograde motion?
According to Daisy, Mercury’s retrograde phase could lead to serious marital problems like infidelity, betrayal, or loss of closeness. It may seem like everything is going wrong in your love life when you bring up old concerns and disagreements, the astrologer warns, as this planet looks to be moving inside.
Communication is essential, but it’s especially important right now because Mercury, the planet of communication, seems to be going backwards. By communicating and being open-hearted and honest, put your attention on strengthening your relationship.
Do ex-lovers return in 2022 during Mercury retrograde?
Capricorn, there’s a good chance that you’ll be haunted by your romantic past during this retrograde because it’s common for retrogrades to bring ex-lovers back into our thoughts, whether through forgotten memories or unexpected DMs. Having fun with the old flames that have unexpectedly flared up may be on your mind, but keep in mind that solid plans may not materialize due to misunderstandings or last-minute cancellations.
Do breakups result from Mercury’s retrograde motion?
In all honesty, if you do decide to leave your relationship with a partner during this time, it was probably meant to bethe universe’s way of telling you that you weren’t on the correct course. The outcomes would not have been affected by Mercury in any manner. Even if it’s terrible, an ending could be what you need to change and move on.
We know you’ll take Mercury’s shenanigans gracefully, whatever happens. As tumultuous as we’ve been led to believe, the crazy retrograde is not as chaotic as it seems.
Is it okay to text him while Mercury is in retrograde?
Things that occur during MRx frequently don’t stick, good or bad. Mercury Retrograde is probably going to bring back feelings you’ve previously tried to push aside. And it’s entirely alright if you give in to these emotions and text or hook up with your ex. Give yourself a break and use caution and wisdom.
Why not break up while Mercury is retrograde?
Although the typical Mercury retrograde period lasts only around three weeks, trust me when I say that a lot may happen in that short amount of time. In actuality, nothing like a backspinning Mercury can make three brief weeks seem like three lengthy millennia. Sadly, one of those lengthy millennia is going to arrive: The summer 2019 Mercury Retrograde officially began on July 7, and it will continue through the last day of the month. Mercury will have plenty of time over this three and a half week period to rip our lives to pieces.
Many people dislike these frequently occurring transits, and I can understand whythey can be a real headache, as they completely impair our ability to commute, communicate, and utilize technology. Not pleasant at all, especially for a millennial who is always on the go and a busy-ass. A Mercury backspin is never a good time to begin new initiatives, make large travel plans, or sign contracts. But what does it signify if you end a relationship this summer while Mercury is in retrograde? Mercury may undoubtedly cause a little bit of chaos in our romantic relationships.
Trust and communication are the foundations of healthy relationships, so if those aspects appear murky, perplexing, or unclear, you’re more inclined to doubt things, act rashly, or utterly misinterpret events. In the worst case scenario, this could result in a Mercury retrograde breakup.
How long should you refrain from contacting your ex?
Even while it can be tempting to contact an ex, doing so may have unfavorable effects. Ideally, any future conversations with your ex-partner will be amicable and result in civil, considerate discourse. However, any attempts at contact could very easily result in you being ignored, harassed, or subjected to other hostile or careless actions, which could exacerbate a wound that is already having difficulty healing. The safest response to the question of whether or not to contact an ex is no. After all, a “no” can easily turn into a “yes,” whereas an attempt to contact an ex cannot be withdrawn once it has been made. Answering this question requires you to think back on the reasons why you split up, which could help you avoid further misery and suffering.
Learning Your Own Motivation Or Reason Behind Wanting to Talk To An Ex
Evaluating your own motive is one of the most crucial factors in deciding whether or not you should contact an ex. This can be challenging since people frequently find it difficult to be honest with themselves about the “why” behind their behavior or can have trouble figuring out the “why” when they are too invested in something to stay objective. This is where therapy may be helpful; ideally, a therapist leads you as you learn about yourself, learning about your goals, wants, boundaries, and motivations. All of these things can help you gain a better understanding of yourself. With this knowledge, you’ll be better able to decide whether your breakup calls for additional investigation of your ex or whether it should be left alone.
Not every divorce calls for therapeutic involvement. Your previous relationships may have ended amicably and cleanly, allowing you to move on and get on with your life. However, if the issue of speaking to an ex has come up, getting to the bottom of your breakup and then moving on from it could be simpler with the help of a dispassionate outsider. Few relationships that end amicably and definitively give rise to thoughts of getting in touch with an ex. The idea of contacting an ex is typically encouraged by painful, unwelcome, or unforeseen breakups, which may have involved much more than a simple misunderstanding or amicable parting.
“Julia is a kind, kind, and open-minded person. She was nice and impartial as she listened. Her counsel was quite helpful to me as I dealt with a painful breakup and subsequent personal issues. She has been a great help in moving me to a happier state of mind with her counsel and compassion.”
Should You Talk to Your Ex?
It actually depends on the individual and their circumstances if ex-lovers can continue to be friends after a breakup. It might be feasible to maintain your friendship if you and the person with whom you were previously involved decide that you are better off as friends rather than lovers. It’s crucial that you both take into account how you feel about the friendship component of your connection and determine if it would be best for you to keep in touch or to completely cut off all communication.
If you and your ex decide to make an effort to stay in touch, it’s important to set clear limits for your friendship and to respect one another’s sentiments if one of you starts to feel like keeping in touch wasn’t the best course of action.
It can be challenging to resist the want to contact an ex, particularly if you have spent a lot of time with them, your relationship lasted a long time, and you used to chat to them every day.
It is not always the case that a couple would stop their relationship and decide to remain friends.
It’s crucial to give yourself time to heal after a breakup and to stop talking for a bit.
Before you start talking again and breaking the quiet, there are a few things you should think about.
- Is your ex trying to get in touch with you? It’s likely that your ex doesn’t want to communicate with you or isn’t ready to do so if they aren’t making an effort to get in touch. In this situation, you should give yourself the space you need to recover and let your ex-partner do the same.
- Reaching out to your ex may put you at risk of being hurt once more if your relationship did not end amicably. Unfortunately, there are instances when moving past the past and into the present is the wisest course of action.
- Who broke up the union? Before you consider talking to your ex after breaking up with them and feeling bad about it, think about how they might be feeling. While the majority of people think that time will eventually heal all scars, everyone heals in their own unique way and at their own pace, so they might not be ready to talk just yet.
- Do you plan to contact your ex since you now believe you are deeply in love with them? And if so, what altered? Consider the impact of contact on both your heart and that of your ex before reaching out to them for a chat. Sometimes it is simpler to let yourself and your ex heal rather than breaking the no contact rule to satisfy your own needs and cause more grief.
Unfortunately, there is no assurance that ex-couples will reconcile. There is no set period of time in which ex-spouses should get back together. After some time apart, some separated couples realize they were happy together. To resolve problems, couples counseling may be required in some circumstances. The length of time before reconciliation can vary depending on how many issues need to be resolved.
When someone wants to grab their attention or win their favor, especially an ex, they frequently utilize the “no contact, no communication” rule as a manipulative strategy.
This can sometimes be successful, as former partners make efforts to patch things up.
Going without communication with your ex, though, can occasionally help them move on.
It is crucial that you adhere to the no contact policy if you genuinely want your ex to move on and want to use no contact as a tool to aid in his transition.
Even if it could be difficult at times, remain away.
No contact entails no calls, texts, or posts on social media.
This denotes NO CONTACT.
When there is no contact, various people have different reactions.
Among the most frequent emotions or thoughts he might be having while there is no touch are:
- He might have thought that by now you would have texted, called, or spoken to him. It’s a good thing if you want his attention since he’s probably thinking about you and wondering what went wrong in your relationship to make it impossible for you to maintain communication.
- He might be considering and regretting the actions he took that led to the breakup if your relationship ended on terrible terms and you felt the need for no contact.
- unsure whether you have started a new relationship or met someone fresh: He might not be aware of any new person or relationship if he hasn’t spoken to you. One of the hardest parts of no contact for a male is this part.
- What shared acquaintances could he contact for information? When an ex demands that they have no contact, guys frequently ask their common friends for advice. Although they may seem casual when broaching the issue, this is a popular tactic to obtain information without making it clear they are still interested in you.
The length of time it takes for an ex to miss you varies depending on the specifics of the breakup and why one or both of you believed that no contact was required. Some people experience feelings of loneliness and longing for their ex right away. Others might go through intermittent phases of grief or missing an ex. An ex may occasionally only experience relief when they stop communicating, particularly if the relationship was dysfunctional or abusive.
The telltale indicators that an ex is done with you differ from person to person.
There are some habits, nevertheless, that might be simple to spot.
- If your ex is over you, he or she will probably treat you similarly to the other women he dates. They might go out of their way to be kind to you or try to catch your attention if they weren’t over you.
- displays no jealous behavior while you are around another person. If the other person moves on to a new relationship, sometimes even the ex who ended the relationship would feel jealous. Even if the envy is not healthy “If they still care about you or want to date you in the extreme, there will be signals.
- They ask you to return their personal property while returning yours. Neither says, “It’s finished, just like receiving personal property. It’s likely that your ex is over you if they ask for their belongings back and quickly hand them to you.
- On social media, they unfriend you or stop following you. Following an ex on social media is one of the simplest methods to stay in touch with them without having to call or text them. Your ex is likely over you if they are no longer on your friend list or following you.
It is normal to wonder if your ex still has feelings for you. Some indications that they still adore you are as follows:
- A former partner who is over you would often unfriend and unfollow you if they see you liking or commenting on their social media postings. Nevertheless, a former partner who is still interested in you might continue to follow you on social media and will typically let you know in some other way that they are “by leaving comments on your posts or photos, or at the very least by clicking the “like” button.
- They appear wherever you go. If your ex continues to appear where you frequent, they might still be interested in you. This is a strategy for some people to stay in touch with someone they still love while attempting to blend in.
- They constantly “accidentally trying to phone, text, or speak to you. Your ex can try to phone or text you if they still love you but believe that you don’t care or don’t want anything to do with them. Even if you react in a displeased manner, it still provides people a chance to get to know you.
One of the most annoying post-breakup situations is when an ex tries to get in touch with you even if they’ve gone on to a new relationship. Of course, having children together gives you good cause to talk to each other about crucial issues. However, there doesn’t seem to be much of a motivation for your ex to get in touch with you if you don’t have any children together (or if your kids are grown). If he recently got a new girlfriend, this is especially true.
Your ex may be contacting you primarily for the purpose of making you envious.
He might be regretting quitting the relationship with you if his new partner isn’t as attentive as he had hoped, especially if you were sensitive to his wants and needs. Sometimes he could only want to be pals.
Whatever the motivation for your ex’s attempt to get in touch with you, it’s critical for your emotional wellbeing that you carefully examine the pros and drawbacks of talking to him.
There are a few signs that a relationship has ended definitively.
First of all, if you don’t live close to one another, your separation may make it simpler for you to resist reaching out and making an effort to visit one another.
You might be relieved that your relationship is finished if it was like riding a roller coaster with ups and downs.
You might think it would be best to allow the split to be final in this situation.
Additionally, it’s a solid sign that the breakup is final if you feel more relieved that the relationship is over or experience less emotional suffering as a result of the split.
Even if the breakup was unpleasant, it is common for a guy to miss you after it.
He may or may not miss you depending on how long you were in a relationship with him and the circumstances surrounding the split.
For instance, if your relationship was more turbulent than tranquil, the breakup may have given him the impression that he is now at peace.
He might miss you more if, on the other side, you both recognized that the relationship wasn’t the ideal fit for you both and ended things amicably.
He might discover that you cross his mind when events in his regular life occur.
Additionally, if you have ever been a pillar of support or comfort for him, he might miss you at trying times.
There are various reasons an ex would wish to stay in touch with you, aside from the fact that you both have kids and need to talk about their care.
Sometimes, an ex will stay in touch with them because they have feelings for them and may want to patch things up.
Some people find that conversing with someone they once spent a lot of time with helps to alleviate the boredom that single life may bring.
It’s critical to spot this behavior because, if your ex is contacting you only out of boredom, there’s a good probability that they’ll cease doing so once they start dating or otherwise forming new relationships.
Some ex-partners feel bad about staying “no contact after a breakup” and believe it’s just polite to stay in touch.
You should consider how this makes you feel and whether continuing to communicate with me feels like a wise decision for you.
It’s crucial to keep in mind the reasons you split up in the first place before thinking about getting in touch with an ex after a period of no contact.
It may be advisable to avoid contact if your relationship ended because of abuse or because you felt in danger.
Your particular preferences will determine how nutritious it is. Occasionally, maintaining that friendship is healthy, and you two can figure something out so you’re still close. However, it’s not good to get so fixated on them that your main objective is to get them back rather than moving on or that you’re attempting to get them back because it’s the only identity you have.
It can be beneficial if you keep in touch with your ex on a friendly level. It can be okay if you were friends before and a relationship didn’t work out. But if you’re attempting to communicate with him in the hopes of reconciling, things might not go well. Often, maintaining in touch may just exacerbate the emotional wound if you split up for the correct reasons.
It’s unhealthy to view your ex as a fallback. No, it isn’t healthy if you’re so intent on reconciling that you find it impossible to maintain friendships. But for many, sticking with your buddies and realizing that all you desire is platonic friendship is beneficial.
The general guideline is to wait 30 days before speaking to your ex-spouse once more. It might be necessary to prolong this to six weeks if you were dating for a very long time before breaking up. The no-contact phase should last no more than two to five months. During the first two weeks, refrain from getting in touch with them because they are still in the “honeymoon” stage and think their decision to break up was the right one.
It varies. It can be wise to mend fences and make amends if you were friends before. Take a chance whether you can work it out and decide to be friends, or perhaps work it out together and develop a friendship or perhaps a romance.
Otherwise, it’s not a good idea to get in touch with your ex after a split if you are aware that you still have feelings for them but it wouldn’t be advisable for you to do so.
Additionally, it is not a good idea to speak to your ex soon away after a breakup. They need time to recover, process their emotions, and move on.
It’s definitely feasible, especially if your friendship came before your relationship. However, it takes a lot of time and effort to return to being friends.
Not everyone has this ability. Many people opt to maintain their friendship with their ex, but later become upset when they decide to start dating someone new or acquire a new girlfriend. It’s good and possible to be friends as long as you can let go of the relationship.
Some people are able to separate their friendship from their emotions and learn to move on.
They are able to be happy and genuine friends with their ex in certain conditions.
Sometimes it is as a result of the fact that they did have a strong friendship before to dating. Other times, it’s because they understand that they can remain friends despite being ex-partners. However, occasionally, some people will stay in touch because they hope to rekindle their relationship.
Sometimes people keep in touch with their ex because they wish to start a relationship with them again and regret breaking up with them. The motivations for maintaining contact can differ. Sometimes they keep in touch to let the other know about the child if there is one involved.
There are numerous motivessome healthy, some unhealthyand the best approach to decide if you should is to consider the relationship from a distance. Then, decide if talking to your ex would be in your best interests.
No, and people who were subjected to abuse should know this in particular. Putting yourself in that situation if you are aware that your ex is abusive and has made dubious statements is unhealthy for you, and you shouldn’t invest your energy there.
Your interests and personal preferences will determine how you define closure. You can go on and live your own life if you learn to forget about your ex, get closure, and move on.
Put them out of your mind. Make an effort to better your life. Stop defining yourself by your ex. Talk to a friend or member of your family that you are close to if you have the need to contact your ex.
Set it up such that you act on another need as soon as it arises. For instance, record your want to talk to them in your journal whenever it arises. Discuss your reasons for feeling this way, why you want to speak with them, and what you want to achieve. After then, tear up the paper while visualizing the feelings that are preventing you from moving forward are fading away in the wind.
The easiest method to avoid the impulse to contact your ex is to do this, and you’ll find that once you start doing it, life becomes a little bit simpler.
After that, you should first declare that you want to speak without interruption. Keep the romance and breakup out of conversation. Though it’s not the worst notion, it’s clearly not the best way to start a conversation. Would you like to focus on it straight away, after all? It’s not advised unless you have a plan to discuss the causes of it and how you’ll change.
Start the conversation off with something they’ll enjoy, if possible. For instance, starting with your passions is a smart idea, and you might mention that. Make sure you’re not doing this to try and chat to them or persuade them to want to talk to you again. Be sincere in all of your interactions.
Don’t be a bootlicker about it, but you should discuss the events in their lives when you speak with them. Additionally, you shouldn’t be too shrewd. Maybe discuss your ambitions and goals.
The emotions will come out when you chat to them. That is very unusual. You must realize that even though you love this person, you shouldn’t be overbearing or try to get back into a relationship right away once it ends. Otherwise, it won’t work and will be unpleasant.
Avoid being fixated on it as well. If you do decide to speak, take your time and perhaps keep the exchanges brief. Show your concern, but try not to let it consume all of your thoughts. Don’t do it; it’s unhealthy.
Depending on the circumstances. Sometimes it could take a long if the discomfort is too great. They will do so if the relationship ended amicably. Even if it doesn’t, sometimes ex-partners will try to manipulate you back, which isn’t advised if the relationship was dysfunctional.
They may occasionally miss you and desire to rekindle their friendship. They will in that case, but not right away.
It’s unlikely that they will if the relationship was particularly tumultuous and neither of you wants to see the other again.
The pain of a relationship is never easy when it involves ex-spouses. However, mastering how to deal with the emotions and move on enables you to take charge of your life and create a better foundation for moving ahead.
